He gets visitation every other weekend and on Wednesday nights for dinner. I’m a nurse and I’ve tried to explain thats this pandemic is serious and should be taken so. He still took her to several public places this past weekend and tells our daughter that he thinks it’s all “stupid”. I’m remarried with a 20 month old that he is putting at risk if our 13 year old brings this virus home to us. We are also older parents. I’m 49 and my husband is 52 and takes high blood pressure medication. We do not have parents that can care for our baby if we end up sick. My parents are deceased and his mom is 80 and lives in California. We are in NC. I’m only trying to keep everyone safe. Do I have any options? I’m currently home with baby and not working. My husband is teleworking from home. We prepared ourselves so we don’t have to leave home for anything.
I agree with the Attorney Saslow that this is a very touchy situation, and I too, am very hesitant to answer, because I am not aware of any guidance issued by the courts to help us advise the public on this issue. I can only say that this is an unprecedented situation, and it calls for unprecedented decision making. The order is still in place during the pandemic. If one parent feels the other is withholding the child, that parent can file a motion for a show cause order. Then the parties will have the opportunity to come in front of a judge and can explain why they felt that a global pandemic and a state of emergency issued by the Governor and the POTUS with instructions to stay at home if possible and not to mingle with others was a good enough reason not to let their child go and mingle with others. Personally, I think that most judges would be understanding, and probably won't hold the withholding parent in contempt as long as visitation resumes as soon as the risk subsides, but I don't really know for sure, and so if you are thinking about withholding, you do so at your own risk. There is still a chance that you may be held in contempt. You never really know until the judge makes his or her decision. If you do choose to withhold, you should try to discuss it calmly (if possible) with the other parent, and take measures to insure that the child and the visiting parent have plenty of contact through telephone, Facetime, Skype etc.
I really wish I had a more definitive answer for you, but that is the best that I can do right now.
You have a very difficult question that I'm hesitant to answer and I anticipate others will be as well. Looking only at the legal issues, you need to follow the terms of the custody order. If it says that he is to get visitation, you need to give him that time. COVID-19 doesn't automatically excuse one of the parties from following the terms of the existing order.
Now is the time where co-parenting is more important than ever, so all I can tell you is that you should try to have productive talks with the father to explain your concerns. Finally, if you feel that the current custodial arrangement isn't working (health concerns perhaps?), you might have grounds to seek a modification.
