Drunk father is in and out of kids lives
I am divorced and have full legal and residential custody of my three kids. Visitation is listed as being worked out amongst the parents in the divorce decree. My exhusband has been an alcholic and drug user (cocaine and pot) for about 15 years now. He comes in and out of the kids life, calls about every 3-6 months or so and hasn't seen the kids in 3 years. Now that he is working a rehab program and seeing a therapist again for the billion time he would like to come and visit the kids for like 1-2 days the most. He lives in a different state. He is also $5,000 in child support debt. The kids are doing great and are stable, have a great step-dad and family. I am afraid all this in and out is unhealthy for the kids. Is there something I can do? The kids don't even want to talk to him when he calls and don't want to see him. My eldest child has a love hate thing for him and I am tired of this whole situation, its been so many years. Please help, I don't want my kids to grow up screwed up. Thanks.
Re: Drunk father is in and out of kids lives
Unless your ex is so bad a court would involuntarily terminate his parental rights, or he is willing to do so voluntarily, you're not likely to be totally rid of the ex. A court is extremely hesitant to sever a parental right unless it is clearly in the best interest of the child or the parent does so voluntarily. You may consider having an attorney file a motion to modify the decree to more tightly limit the exposure to the kids (eg, supervised only).
You may also want to pursue the $5k overdue child support with an attorney, but if the ex has no resources (eg, job, bank), then it may be wasted effort especially if you've got your life going well otherwise.
